MARRIAGE: THE As-Zs OF NEVERS:

A- ADULTERY (part 1)

Adultery is sexual intercourse with someone other than your marriage partner. Adultery is the most painful destroyer of marriage. It destroys the lifeline of trust and often leaves painful scars on the faithful spouse as well as the children and extended families.

Let’s begin by noting God’s attitude toward adultery with few texts:

1 Corinthians 6:9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, ¹⁰ nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, shall inherit the kingdom of God. ¹¹ And such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, and in the Spirit of our God. ¹² All things are lawful for me, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be mastered by anything. ¹³ Food is for the stomach, and the stomach is for food; but God will do away with both of them. Yet the body is not for immorality, but for the Lord; and the Lord is for the body. ¹⁴ Now God has not only raised the Lord, but will also raise us up through His power. ¹⁵ Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take away the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? May it never be! ¹⁶ Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to a harlot is one body with her? For He says, "The two will become one flesh." ¹⁷ But the one who joins himself to the Lord is one spirit with Him. ¹⁸ Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body. ¹⁹ Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? ²⁰ For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.

Proverbs 5:1 My son, give attention to my wisdom, Incline your ear to my understanding; ² That you may observe discretion, And your lips may reserve knowledge. ³ For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, And smoother than oil is her speech; ⁴ But in the end she is bitter as wormwood, Sharp as a two-edged sword. ⁵ Her feet go down to death, Her steps lay hold of Sheol. ⁶ She does not ponder the path of life; Her ways are unstable, she does not know it. ⁷ Now then, my sons, listen to me, And do not depart from the words of my mouth. ⁸ Keep your way far from her, And do not go near the door of her house, ⁹ Lest you give your vigor to others, And your years to the cruel one; ¹⁰ Lest strangers be filled with your strength, And your hard-earned goods go to the house of an alien; ¹¹ And you groan at your latter end, When your flesh and your body are consumed; ¹² And you say, "How I have hated instruction! And my heart spurned reproof! ¹³ "And I have not listened to the voice of my teachers, Nor inclined my ear to my instructors! ¹⁴ "I was almost in utter ruin In the midst of the assembly and congregation." ¹⁵ Drink water from your own cistern, And fresh water from your own well. ¹⁶ Should your springs be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets? ¹⁷ Let them be yours alone, And not for strangers with you. ¹⁸ Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice in the wife of your youth. ¹⁹ As a loving hind and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; Be exhilarated always with her love. ²⁰ For why should you, my son, be exhilarated with an adulteress, And embrace the bosom of a foreigner? ²¹ For the ways of a man are before the eyes of the LORD, And He watches all his paths. ²² His own iniquities will capture the wicked, And he will be held with the cords of his sin. ²³ He will die for lack of instruction, And in the greatness of his folly he will go astray.

Hebrews 13:4 Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.

Let’s not forget that the same God who says that adultery carries severe penalties is the same God who offers His grace for restoration and healing (Psa 32; 51; 1 Jn 1:9; Pro 28:13; Titus 2:4).

The world in which we live is bombarded with illicit sex 24/7. Adultery and fornication is glorified on a regular basis in the magazines, on Tele, and on the radio. What else fills our TV shows and movies these days? Sex is everywhere from the pop psychologists to the gossip columns.

Sex sells.  Years ago Volkswagen was about to go ‘belly up’ due to low sales. They decided to start a new advertising technique: to tell the truth. They ran an ad that was all about scientifically proving that the Volkswagen Bug was the best buy anybody could possible make. They cited various economic factors such as frequency of repair records and the great MPG. This ad is often cited as the least effective commercial in the history of the world. The Bug almost died as a result of that commercial. The next year they ran an ad with girls in bikinis and the sales went up. Sex sells.

Apart from daily renewal of the mind (Rom 12:1-2) and habitual life in the Spirit (Gal 5:22-23), rather than in the old sin nature (Gal 5:19-21, adultery and fornication head the list), the believer simply cannot help but absorb the ubiquitous sexual messages of the kosmos. This results in the believer becoming obsessed with illicit sex almost every waking moment of every day. Only by advancing in the spiritual life will the believer ever break free from constant thoughts of carnal sex – which is the only kind of sex the world really knows or talks about (I am not using ‘carnal’ in the theological sense of being out of fellowship, I am using its secular sense of denoting appetites of the flesh). Sex as designed by God is so much more than physical appetite. It is about love, transcendence and unity, i.e. the one flesh. When the believer grows in God’s view of sex, the only one he or she thinks about sexually will be the spouse. The emphasis will be on love and transcendence – though certainly not to the exclusion of pleasure.

There are thousands upon thousands of books on sex offered by the kosmos. However, there is only one Book that really teaches the beauty and deep love of sex, namely the Bible. The more doctrine we have and use the more we have a deeper inner understanding of God’s viewpoint of sex. The less doctrine and the more out of fellowship we are, the more superficial we are and the more we will be constantly dominated by the physical appetites. With all of the books out there one might think that the world really understands a lot about sex; however, it is just the opposite. It is when the pipes are leaking and the sinks are backed up that people buy books on plumbing.

Doctrine matters!

PT - Don